| David Gane

Exhausted

Hey Ang,

It feels like it's been forever since I wrote you.

Whoa, we've had a couple of busy weeks. Our books arrived, then you had your birthday, and I gave you a surprise copy. Then our book started popping up around town and we were invited to our first book signing. To top it all off, we landed smack-dab in the middle of New & Hot Fiction in Chapters, Indigo, and Coles stores all across Saskatchewan.

Yet, that hasn't been it. We've also been quietly planning more book signings and other special events, we've got book 2, Shepherd's Watch, being prepared to be released at the end of January, and we are building the outline for Book 3, so we can get to work on it ASAP.

And even then, we weren't done... You've been teaching and I've been prepping an online class, and then I helped move my mother out of our family home, which lead me to ridding myself of 20 years of old journals (which is a blog post you and I need to make at some point).

And it isn't until I wrote all this out, that I suddenly understood why I've been feeling so exhausted and unfocused.

After coming home last week, my motivation and energy was almost zero. I started missing my blog post deadlines (that's why it's good to have you, partner!), I wanted to nap all the time, and I kept putting off my to-do list items—

Did I mention that my to-do list failed last week? You know how I love my processes and habits, but when they fail (stupid technology!), it makes my productivity implode.

Then I was travelling again this week and I missed more deadlines and I was eating like crap and not exercising and now I'm at a point where I almost need to lower the numbers on my weights and start fresh.

This week has been all about trying to dig myself out of the hole, get back into a routine, and get stuff done. I've been forcing myself off the couch and walking, eating better, and building my lists on what needs to get done. Again, I have to thank you for covering my slack-ass attitude.

But the whole thing got me thinking about takeaways:

  1. I worry about book signings and travel. Not the day hops, but if we go out of province for a night. I need to be sure to run or swim or lift and eat as healthy as I can.
  2. I love to-do lists and technology, but when they fail, it's very frustrating. Most of these to-do list apps don't play well with each other and need some third party app to help you move from one to the other. Now that I've done it once, I'm less intimidated, but it was frustrating and definitely didn't help with my lack of focus.
  3. Along with to-do lists, my new app, Todoist, works better at organizing the roles and projects I have than my old one. I've only used it for a week, but so far I'm impressed.
  4. It wasn't until afterwards that I realized the emotional/psychic toll that occurred with the move. A lot of stress occurs not only within yourself but how everyone around you is handling it, and I don't think it was something that could be avoided.
  5. Whenever I lose energy and get this way, I have to remind myself that there are two things I must always do: 1) Walk the dog. Fresh air, exercise, and 55 minutes of time alone to think and refocus are the best things to do. 2) Sit down and write out every worry, every role I have, and every project within those roles. A brain dump is the best way to clear the log jam.

I think that's it for me. Stay safe and have a good weekend.

David

PS - I have one funny story to share: When I was writing the Casey Neistat post, I was sitting in a coffee shop in my hometown. I was hard at work, headphones in, focused on the screen. An old guy sat down beside me and started talking and I only realized after a minute that it was to me. He was asking what I was doing, I explained, and went back to work. Then I realized he kept reading my notebook and my screen and telling his buddies about it.

I'm so used to going to coffee shops in the city and doing my work, I forgot that things would be different in a town. Unlike here, where people keep to themselves, there, people are curious and want to visit. I guess I've been away too long.

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